A letter to take to the grave, jan 3 2012

As you lie beneath me in your grave,
Upon your stone I set my gaze,
These dates here inscribed,
And all the dates in between,
I saw you never,
Save a shock of dark brown hair,
And a frame completely still,
I cannot but think,
What a tragic pair we make,
You all young and strong,
Yet dying in your fathers arms,
Me desperately trying everyday,
To do as I am told,
You, taken in your innocence,
Me, my innocence taken from me!
To think eighteen years have passed,
Oh, how I hope heaven suits you!
Oh, how I wish for something to suit me here before I go.
In making a place of compassion for others,
I hope to find something of my own.

Not My Mistake?

You see, I have this blog called fatal mistake. Only it's not my mistake...or it's not only my mistake. I just don't own it as I used to...and I've no shame in sluffing it off either...not that I'm sluffing! Personal journal - January 2, 2012

A letter NOT to give my parents

I should have told you, "no!" but I was too busy being your "good girl". Those words meant everything to me, sunshine and air! You failed me, each in different ways. I finally protect myself. I finally trust myself more than I trust anyone else. This is a lesson I will not make my children wait to learn on their own. Personal safety is a personal responsibility. Obedience is insufficient. I will teach my children to listen to their own good advise. I believe we know what is best for ourselves. We will see how much water this idea holds as my children grow older!